And let's not forget the way I screamed when it was revealed that literally THE BEST BOOK EVER WRITTEN was plagiarised from lil old Kellan. I don't want to be an asshole (in other words: *proceeds to be an asshole*), but her trauma seemed deeper, rawer than that of Kellan.

everyone said how emotional this book was and I bought tissues for this book and didn't even used any of them. why did he keep giving hope to Charlotte if he had known beforehand that his decision wasn't going to change? stars omg we lost you 😭🤚 i find it so interesting how we perceived Tate and Charlotte's love story so different, but that's the beautiful thing about reading cause we perceive it all differently 👀 but at least we agree on Tate being the superior Marchetti ? While every person deals with trauma differently and it's not fair to make comparisons, I'm still arguing my case: the author did Charlotte so, so dirty in the book. yes it's long and for some people, it may drag, but i really enjoy long books (zodiac academy and binding/keeping 13 girls will get it), and this was a slow burn at its finest.My only tiny complaint with this book (and why it wasn't a full 5 stars for me) was that sometimes I felt like all Charlie and Tate had in common was Kellan and their complex emotions surrounding him. Yet, this book became a nice exception for me because Charlotte wasn't the only one who had left the last shred of her dignity on Tate's door threshold.

tate had understandable reasons on why he hated his dad - she didn’t have to constantly pry into their personal business. god this book is heartbreaking, but it slowly very slowly puts ur heart back together — the journey of grief in this book was beautifully written.He reached for a silver tissue box, wiping himself off—her privates shielding his—and tucking himself back in. More often than not, romance books I stumble upon feel almost rehearsed, like another scene I had witnessed with countless fictional couples in other books. I didn’t care for the small redemptions some of them had—Leah realizing not everything is about her and finally being the older sister she had to be, Terry saying he’s not a fraud (he is), Charlie…is Charlie, Tate…is Tate, Kellan is…dead. Reviews for this vary from crying and emotional to shaking and throwing up, as it deals with suicide, depression, mental health (you know how it works).

the ob-gyn finger bang scene was so cringy and unnecessary - it was not sexy like the author intended it to be bc i literally cringed so hard and died from second hand embarrassment. The story of self-hatred, pain, survival, and grief was so fucking beautiful, it was a huge part of this book, the most important part. their relationship was so pure, untouched by the darkness because they escaped all of that in each other. Besides feeling zero sympathy and chemistry for Kellan and Charlie, Tate and Charlie had nothing to share besides shared grief and guilt about Kellan.This book is such an emotional read😭 It deals with so much: grief, guilt, mental health, addiction, forgiveness (of yourself and others), dysfunctional families, and so much more. to cry over my brooding, suicidal teenage boy Kellan's POV and his loyal old friend — depression — I spent on trying to come to terms with the fact that I had to struggle through four (4 and not counting) days in the head of a character who was going to end up dead anyway (spoilers can make you that cynical, I guess). Did he believe she wouldn't come to their place that year and thus decided it was his perfect cue to leave this world like a gentleman? Quoting my darling twinsie, I have no morals, so don't be surprised if I'll tell you I didn't even mind when he took her virginity with his fingers during her ob-gyn exam - and made her come like crazy - and apparently I've been seeing the wrong doctors.

Parker Huntington has literally written some of my all time favorite books and now I can say she has written my absolute favorite. despite its flaws, i still found this to be a very complex book with well thought out characters who help each other move on from their grief. i’d started feeling like a creep about an hour ago after i’d showed up in front of her workplace, challenging my inner joe goldberg.She became so desperate and horny when Tate told her to spread her legs [for him] to perform the pap smear, as well as deciding to take a bimanual exam because she was horny, causing her to have her hymen broken (she was a virgin). I haven’t read this author before, I didn’t read the blurb, it was picked for part of a book club so I jumped in blind.